Here’s some “Phil” trivia for you: For a few years back in the late 1990s I lived in wild, wonderful West Virginia. It wasn’t by choice. The most entertaining part of that whole deal – aside from listening to fight’n and whore’n stories from Junior, my friend and neighbor – was that each May I could make the easy drive up to a little town called Newcomerstown, Ohio for the annual Bigfoot Conference. It was always a hoot. Sometimes Junior came along with me. Sometimes I went solo.
Back then, a guy named Don Keating headed up an outfit called the Eastern Ohio Bigfoot Investigation Center (EOBIC), and they were the bunch who organized the annual conference. Keating did a helluva job. He invited legitimate guest speakers (biologists, forest rangers, published authors, etc. – you name it), hosted workshops and guided hikes, and put together events that covered pretty much anything a serious Bigfoot investigator might wish for.
Sadly, EOBIC is no longer around. It morphed into a few other short-lived groups over the years, and the last fragments appear to have settled into what’s now called the Ohio Bigfoot Organization (OBO). Keating officially parted ways from the group in 2012. If you’re interested, the OBO still puts on an annual Bigfoot conference in Ohio, but fair warning: The event is nothing like it used to be – which I’ll speak to below. It’s more of a dog and pony show these days, a place to listen to people provide live commentary to Youtube videos, a place to buy yourself a bigfoot belt buckle. Not really my cup of tea.
One interesting note about Don Keating: The official story of his break with the group that he founded indicates that he finally gave up his interest in Bigfoot because he was “unable to find any hard evidence after 30 years of trying.” I seriously doubt that to be the case. Heck, I remember him presenting detailed lab results of Sasquatch hair samples back in the 90s, so lack of evidence doesn’t fit the bill. As such, I can’t help but wonder why the official story makes it a point to say Keating is no longer a Bigfoot believer. Did his group get infiltrated and undermined from within? Was he forced out? I guess we’ll never know.
Bigfoot People
Back in the day, the Bigfoot conferences in Ohio were excellent, and I really looked forward to going to them. I think I attended four or five or so. Although I didn’t recognize it at the time, these events were probably at their peak awesomeness, just before the whole thing got corporate.
I thought I’d share a couple interesting remembrances from back then. But before I do, please allow me to paint the scene a little.
I bet the attendance was somewhere around 100 at the first conference I attended in 1995, and that number probably tripled over the ~5 years that followed. We would all sit at big, long folding tables in a lodge building’s cafeteria at a nearby state park, and the speakers would stand up front with an overhead projector. (If you don’t know what an overhead projector is, it’s worth looking it up. I can confirm that people once found them to be quite useful.) It got to be more and more crowded over the years, until it was standing room only. After that the conference moved to a community college auditorium. There was no microphone in the early days, and the cafeteria acoustics were, well, cafeteria-like, so it was a pain to hear everything if you got there late and got stuck in the back of the room. I can tell you this: I didn’t want to miss a word.
In terms of the overall spirit of the conferences, I guess it’s best to put it this way: The fundamental question being asked was not about whether or not Bigfoot exists. Everyone was in agreement on a “yes” to that. The main thrust was about what to do once a Bigfoot is captured, dead or alive. You see, the Bigfoot people were split about 50/50 back then, between people who believed that we should regard Bigfoot as a distant cousin with whom we should attempt peaceful communications, and professional and amateur trackers/hunters whose life ambition was to gun down a Bigfoot in the deep woods and haul its carcass back to civilization.
So there you have the backdrop against which my following Bigfoot conference memories were forged. I have dozens more stories along these lines. I’m just cherry-picking a couple that seem blog-worthy…
The Patterson Film
One of my favorite speakers from all the conferences was a primatologist. I lost my original notes with her name, so I’ll call her Dr. Smith. I do remember that she had a PhD in Anthropology from the University of Chicago. She gave an excellent talk on the Patterson film, and shared her analysis of it from a primatologist’s perspective. Really good stuff.
In case you’re not familiar with it, the Patterson–Gimlin film (a.k.a. the ‘Patterson film’ or ‘PGF’) is a short film of an alleged Bigfoot that was recorded in October, 1967 alongside Bluff Creek, in Northern California. It’s pretty much the Zapruder film of the Bigfoot world. You can watch it here. Many people believe this to be the real deal, actual film footage of a real Bigfoot. Many other people imagine this to be a hoax, a film of a person in a furry creature costume.
Dr. Smith’s analysis was compelling, to say the least. I’ve not read or seen anything like it since. Her presentation was primarily related to anatomy, kinesiology, and behavior – the way the creature in the Patterson film looks, moves, and acts. The key points that stuck with me were as follows:
- When a human walks, the hinge point of the foot is pretty far forward, basically at the base of the toes. When a primate walks, the hinge point of the foot is further back, closer to the ankle. The creature in the Patterson film has feet that hinge like a primate. This would be physically impossible for a “man in a monkey suit.”
- The arms and hands of the creature in the film move more like a primate than a human. A person in a costume could certainly pull this off, but it would require deliberate concentration and some insider knowledge of primate physiology. Notably, the hands curl and close as the arms swing forward. Although the creature is moving fluidly as a biped, this may be a vestige of using the arms and curled hands for walking assistance. Think of how a gorilla uses its front knuckles as it walks.
- Large breasts are visible in several frames, so the creature in the film is female. This would have been a rather progressive costume addition in 1967.
- Muscles can clearly be seen flexing, especially in the legs as they take on weight with each step. A neat trick if it’s a costume.
- At one point the creature looks to its side and back, directly at the camera. This means that it is aware of the presence of the filmmakers. It knows that it is being watched, yet it is not running. This glance at the camera probably would have warranted a do-over for a costumed actor. However, wild, female primates are known to exhibit this type of behavior as a diversion tactic when separated from their young. “Look at me over here! Don’t bother looking over there!” So perhaps the creature in the film was legit – and was not alone.
By the end of her presentation, Dr. Smith had me well-convinced that the Patterson film is not a hoax. What do you think?
Squatch Watch
This story comes from a guy named Sam who sat across the table from me at the ’98 conference. He was a nice guy, probably in his mid-forties, with rough, weathered hands and a good amount of grey in his beard. Sam and I got to talking during one of the breaks. He said that he had hunted all his life and had spent countless hours in the woods doing what hunters do – hiking, tracking, waiting, staying quiet and alert. He had come to the Bigfoot conference so he could be around people that didn’t think he was crazy. Sam told me that he had an “experience” that disturbed him deeply. He didn’t want to believe it, but he knew that it really happened.
I pressed him to tell me his story. This is paraphrasing, but it’s close to what Sam shared with me:
“I always used to look forward to bow season. Not any more.
“I’ve got some good luck spots back up in the hills, and some tree stands that I built myself. I call my favorite stand ‘Maple ’ on account of it being in a big old white maple tree. There’s a deer trail close by, and the wind is usually perfect there, and it’s a real good perch.
“Well, the year before last I wanted to get out there at sun-up. It’s a long hike, so I went part-way the day before, as far as my ATV could get me anyway, and I camped overnight. I got up early the next day and hiked the rest of the way out to Maple. I got settled in about 5 am. Maple’s cozy as hell and I can hold up there for a long time.
“When sun-up came, maybe even before, I could tell somethin’ was ‘off.’ It was way too quiet, for one thing. The air was dead still, and there were none of the little critter sounds that you’d normally hear. No birds singing. No squirrels chattering. Nothing. A couple hours go by and I started to get this weird feeling that I was being watched. More than that. I knew I was being watched. So I start scanning around, looking for anything moving. I did see a squirrel or two, but they weren’t too lively, and they were keeping real quiet. Other than that, nothing.
“Then I got my line of sight locked onto a big clump of laurel about 15 yards away. I think it was intuition more than anything, because it wasn’t moving. Or maybe I did see a little movement. You know how your mind can play tricks on you when you stare at something long enough. Anyway, I decided to stare at that laurel for as long as I had to. I must’ve stared right at it for 20 minutes. And then, well, I guess I won the staring contest. Or maybe I lost.
“This thing, this creature, this Bigfoot stood up from behind the laurel and I could see it as plain as day. It was eight feet tall if it was an inch. It was crouching behind that laurel and it must’ve thought I saw it, so it stood up and looked right at me. And it wasn’t a friendly kind of look. We locked eyeballs for a few seconds, and it turned and walked off real slow and back into the woods. Barely made a sound as it walked. And then it was gone.
“The funny thing is, when I saw it I knew it had been there that whole time, all those hours, just watching me. Another funny thing is, well, I don’t much go into the woods anymore. I don’t hunt or camp or anything. Used to love to hunt. Hunted all my life. Now I stay out of the woods ‘cause I know those things are out there.”
Sam was an honest, salt-of-the-earth kind of guy. His voice and hands were trembling a bit as he told me all this. He definitely wasn’t a nut. To be honest, just writing about Sam’s story gives me the chills. Even after all these years. I remember shaking a little too as Sam was telling it to me. My friend, Junior, was sitting next to me. He was totally freaked out by it. I thought his eyes were gonna pop out of his head at one point. I’m pretty sure Junior skipped deer season that year. So what about you? Are you buying it?
Phil’s Two Cents
My thoughts on Bigfoot: Yep, I think Bigfoot is real. And I also think it’s not just a North American thing. I think they’re all around the world, known by different names.
To those who say that we live in a world dominated and overrun by humans, where no creatures the size of Bigfoot could possibly go undetected, I would respectfully say that there are massive expanses of raw wilderness areas in the United States alone, places where trees fall in the woods and nobody’s there to hear them.
To those who say that if Bigfoot is real, then surely someone somewhere would have found one by now, I would agree wholeheartedly. I think they are ‘found’ all the time, but the evidence is either suppressed or ignored. Such is the way with most information that falls outside the established box.
Some parting thoughts here…
Rule #1: Keep an open mind. The world may be more mysterious than we’ve been led to believe.
Rule #2: If you find a Bigfoot, I would suggest not calling the local police or TV station, and not bragging about it on social media. Unless, that is, you’re OK with disappearing and/or being lampooned.
Rule #3: Always be mindful when you’re out hunting or hiking or farting around in the woods. Bigfoot might be watching!
– “Phil”
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